They were Right to Bring The Undertaker Back

 

The title above is half a sentence. It should read: They were right to bring The Undertaker back but they’ve told the wrong story.

WWE needs a boost, there’s no doubt about this. Weekly ratings are continually low, which I fear will continue to be the case whilst WWE Creative flounder through Raw episodes three hours in length, and the winter season is always a lull before the road to WrestleMania kicks off via the Royal Rumble. An injection of the Phenom ensures there’s less of a plateau.

The episode of Raw that saw a massive in-ring brawl continue to the backstage area was one of the best moments the Monday night show has produced since the Attitude Era. That’s no exaggeration. It had believable tension and brutality. It felt like something was unfolding naturally. We were witnessing an incident. Unfortunately the script to accompany the action isn’t as strong.

The Undertaker needed to return as a heel. Don’t boo me, it makes sense. He’d already received the massive pop – as a returning legend is always guaranteed – when he turned up at Battleground. After which WWE should have placed the product over sentiment. He’s played the bad guy before, he could again. Brock Lesnar is – or was, depending how this story plays out – over with the fans. More over than anyone could have ever reasonably expected. Current planning ruins this.

The blocks were in place for a heel Undertaker appearance. It’s more believable he was getting revenge for his brother’s (kayfabe) broken ankle than some annoyance regarding Heyman’s eighteen month bragathon.  To whine about Brock boasting now makes him appear weak. It also damages the growing powers of Bray Wyatt having The Undertaker declare this is his real return.

The chances are The Deadman will get his revenge at SummerSlam, if anything it gives WWE the option for a third and final showdown further down the line (WrestleMania perhaps, if Sting never shows up in a WWE ring again?). And this probability adds further weight to an evil Undertaker plan. To beat Lesnar he had to go to dark places, tap into a side he’d long since abandoned. It makes for a more plausible story.

It’s only the appearance of a more viscous side that will make Brock’s disappearance post-SummerSlam more believable. Only bad guys cause long-term injury in the WWE. Heel tactics also mean less wrestling, and witnessing the way the Tombstone Piledrivers were delivered at Battleground (awkward and cumbersome) leads me to believe the less in-ring action the better for the Man in Black.

The WWE could do with the ‘Taker ratings boost right now, it just needs the right sort of ‘Taker to maximise the potential of the Beast Incarnate.




Clive Balls's memoir Balls To You is available here from the Amazon store.

Teachings from Tokyo

The WWE Network aired its first live performance from Tokyo, Japan. Labelled after Brock Lesnar, the jewel in the crown, it taught us nothing new about the Beast Incarnate. It did reveal that WWE is aware of sensitivities surrounding the way it delivers stories and conclusions. Here we learnt a lot about the WWE and its self-awareness.

As some of you will know from my autobiography Balls To You, I’m no stranger to wrestling. My father competed in Germany but his career was sadly cut short before he had the opportunity to travel further afield. I was did get to visit Japan with my band. Whilst there I was fortunate enough to see some wrestling events. I’m confident in the coming days much will be made of the Japanese crowd from this Saturday. It didn’t surprise me.

Just like their in-ring action, the Japanese audience is a constant conveyor belt of excitement and flow. Consider the westerners that have won them over in the past – like Chris Jericho – observe the style they used to do it, and you’ll get an idea of how high octane means something different there. They also buy more into action as opposed to soap opera finishes.

We now know WWE were aware of this and didn’t dare “cheat” the intelligent fans. It would have been easier for WWE creative to throw a few dodgy finishes in. They like to do it so much on TV because it can get the result they desire while keeping both competitors looking strong. In reality it just makes us at home groan and invalidates any result. In Tokyo they took their balls out of their mother’s purse and went for clean outcomes all show.

First up was the aforementioned Jericho against Neville. This was always going to be a clean match. It was also one of the hardest to call. We’ve witnessed Y2J pass the torch so many times (bet he ponders that Fandango one now) that it seemed probable he was here to put Neville over. But in what would set the marker for the rest of the night, WWE acknowledged Japanese support for the talent on show. Jericho cut his teeth as the Lionheart and the fan base in Tokyo got the win they wanted. It was a classic of a match, finished off with the LionTamer, minutes earlier Neville was subjected to what I reckon is the most painful Walls of Jericho ever seen.

The Divas followed and, not to be flippant, what I learnt here is that I’ve lost my faith in the division. It was actually a decent match but the characters, barring Paige, are flat. And there is no story. It’s time to introduce the NXT Divas to liven the division up.

The title and presumed spectacle of the show entered in the middle of it to face the formidable opponent of Kofi Kingston. That was said with a slight hint of sarcasm. Still, this match did reveal that WWE would avoid any interference. The New Day members allowed the match to play fair – all four minutes of it. Kofi barely passed through Suplex City before the F5 ended his day. After the match his pals did arrive before also finding the mat the hard way. Fast as it was, it’s always a privilege to see Lesnar.

Next was match of the night, in terms of anticipation and delivery, for the NXT Championship. Finn Balor faced current champ Kevin Owens. Now, what did we learn? First off you need to ask: what do you think needed to happen? Kevin Owens has outgrown NXT, he already is part of the main roster. So there needed to be a way to drop the belt and remain looking strong. Another problem with this is Balor himself is ready for promotion to Raw.

It was the fight where WWE Creative most needed a get out of jail free card. But Tokyo rules meant no such luck. They had to revert to traditional action with an undisputed result. Owens mocking Cena’s move set gives a new narrative, that he was no longer focused on the NXT Championship. That the inevitable moment Balor took the 1-2-3 Owens was already moving onto his next “proper” match. It doesn’t entirely work for me. Cena should surely beat a man put away by Balor? But that doesn’t take away from how good this match was.

This review could end here really. We learnt – or saw – nothing new from the tepid main event that was King Barrett and Kane vs John Cena and Dolph Ziggler. There was no Kevin Owens appearance to hurt Cena. Again, WWE played it clean. The result was predictable. You know which Goldenboy got the pin. He paraded around afterward with the man that should have been main eventing by now. Instead Ziggler stands in purgatory. At this point his career hangs by a thread. Unfulfilled in WWE and too big to wander elsewhere. This is why WWE needs a major rival.

WWE Tokyo showed us the writers do understand fan frustration with questionable finishes and when required they can put on a great, clean show. Good matches are always better with endings that don’t leave the fans feeling robbed. Let’s hope we see more WWE on-the-road events via the network.